oh....today was terrible at home-econs...we forgot to bring along our recipe and we didn't know how to cook and we didn't get the full ingredients...we could do nth and had to do our cooking in our own way....which didn't turn out very appetizing....AND the blur me forgot my apron and had to buy a new one at a price of 5 bucks!!! there goes my pocket money.....so depressed you noe?! not only did we cook horribly....my pocket money flew away!!! arrghs!!! hais..i flunk my home-econs and i forgot to study for 2 tests yesterday had maths test i didn't study the day before cause i was too tired after comp team training and today i had science test i didn't study it yesterday!! i'm starting to feel that because of the regular comp team trainings i got too worn out to even sit still and study and my MAMA was not very pleased with me....hais...but competition is coming,...i hope to get this over and done with and start concentrating on my studies....i don't want to flunk my CA2....and Vinder!!! she never come school today and there goes my ice gems biscuit....got pissed...NVM hopes she comes tomorrow i'll give her a dressing down tomorrow!!! she'll die!...hahas

hiie!!! didn't get to blog for like 2 freaking days...hais....just yesterday we wasted our time because a lot of things happen....poor thing...Fiqah has regular leg cramps like every nite than her appendix pain always and sme where else larhs..poor her she soo young only so many problems....see ready very heart pain sias...last night cried because i thught of her having leg cramps than when she in pain can't do anything to help her....very sad..she say see doctor, doctor say never mind and stuff like that i tiink she inherit from her PAPA because she told me her PAPA also had regular leg cramps..i had them too before its really painful...than Rai had her random mood swings and she started crying than to make matters worst..poor Jes hyper ventilated for a long time and i could do nth so sad...Pris got slighty pissed and went home sharp at 4.30pm....hais...today..Fiqah didn't turn up for training as she needs to fetch her brother...Pris went to see the doctor...Eunice cow came for training today...me too...poor Jes Jes hyper ventilate again...hais i very scared she actual day like that you know....OMG....poor mam nerissa got pinched several times by Fiqah yesterday and got quite a bit frm Rai...she's in blue and black now..hais poor thing...in batam...got sick and slept on her like pillow...felt so indebted to her....OMG....everything's in a mess now.....

Our form teachers made tangyuan for us to eat!!! but that was long ago hahs..i just got the photos marhs....2E4!!!

the person on the extreme right hand side..she is my TUDI !!!~

yo! since come back from GOS camp never talk abt it but anyways even if i don't say other people will talk abt it one larhs i lazy marhs...nth to say..oh the GOS video for presentation finish les than mam they all show us than fiqah and shah shah cry cause miss the times in GOS with all those kids there they all really very the cute!!!! but very sad can't go orphanage sias...very pity them but what to do?? heard ms chandran say her story to us but i heard some1 share their reflection saying that the kids there saw us but already realised that we are going to stay a while than go off...i guess its really upsetting to see the kids like that....don't noe how to put it...i feel really stressed now not because of my results...but i'm really angry with myself....its like my existance really give the people around me a lot of trouble....i have a backbone like my backbone is not straight but it is curved and the doctor say if curve until 25 degrees than ned to wear the plastice thing....it cost like $500 !!! but there's a new one the band one its strechable it cost like $2000 !!! its not a small sum!!! i really wished i wasn't born take comp team for example...if not for me syafiqah would have been inside and she would not have to be a reserved ...than she would have been so upset..raihana too...she really wants fiqah in the main team but she didn't say she didn't want me in she's just pissed off with pris....but i just simply feel that my existance is so extra ...now because of me my mum and all my family members have to worry for me and my uncle want me to wear the band thing...$2000....he has the money but i don't want like that...i really hated god..why does it have to be ME?! i used to be soo happy and healthy and now it happened to me???!!...soo many things happen recently...comp team competetion is coming than ballet exam is like next friday....worst still i have a whole lot of homework to do...this all would not have happened if only i wasn't BORN...my brother says i'm a mistake....he says i was not supposed to be here..and stuff like that...at that time he was insulting me but now i have come to realise probably he was right after all....i was a MISTAKE...hais...

well, yesterday camped in school with some of the GOS people..had quite a bit of fun but was really tired that's why i came home than after bath felt so irritated by everyone..i don't noe why guess is mood swing bah... on Friday we had training and stuff like that than mam Hwee Ing was like angry with our attitude towards comp team...than was lecturing us than made everyday training compulsary...hais than rajes cried probably because mam Hwee Ing put too much stress on her..she commader marhs than leader somemre...that day we got our report book back than my tudi cry three times because of her result and she strees marhs..smemre mam hwee ing oso stress her hais...than raihana, syafiqah, me oso cry....hais dun talk abt that le larhs...yesterday GOS camp i sleep with my tudi than aiyoo can't sleep...before she sleep must pull ppl hair than pull pillow haiyoo....but fun bahs.....

today...arrgh!!! so freaking pissed...had training in the afternoon than had fun doing DEMO, we did horrid looking drills than we had first aid case..haa fun my tudi hais...do practical ok ok larhs...not soo bad..got improvement...guess what i realised that Eunice and irshad both sprained thier ankle... poor thing but raihana a bit of mood swing today...no idea why.....than i was a maid to my upstairs my senior senior...had fun...i was in debt to her for 5 freaking days as her full time maid...yup interesting anyways...but what got me freaking pissed off was i brother's attitude!!!! freak it!! i couldn't stand him! he was home like 7.25pm +++ i have no idea he left me at my grandma hse and wnet home himself..than i was like arrgh....NVM...than when he came right home he hogged the damn computer for 3-4 freaking hrs!!! freak it! than i wanted to blog at 10pm for an hour and he refused which is the reason he claimed he was doing his DNT assignment...i got soo angry! OMG! he was hogging the damn freaking computer for so long than now he tells me he just started hos assginment?! WTH?!? yeesh....i could have killed him!!@#$%*@ and he says he'll let me use the computer at like wat?! 10.30pm????!!!! wat the HELL?! he promised me 10pm and he knows i want to end this all at 11pm..like wat the?! arrgh! not only that i got MORE pissed when he said he wanted the time he allocated for me to end and i have end at that time SHARP?! wat the freak?! i mean he was hogging the freak computer for hours and i didn't even mentioned a word and now i just want to use for 30mins he still have to
make sure i finish at the correct time???!!! WAT THE HELL???!!! i quarreled with him which i shan't go into details for that! anyway i'm still freaking pissed! ARRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

great! saturday was Public Duty at siglap, well...we had quite a bit of fun time there...with syafiqah around...its always fun! the kids there were hard to control....NVM...shan't talk abt PD...erm...yeah it was rather late at nite when we finished and i made aishah my bestiie angry with me! she says i show attitude so she was rather oissed off by me...but not to worry..i'll make it up to her! that day was a chain of people crying...raihanna cried than syafiqah....than aishah..than ME...hais...each to their own...problems...Nvm don't talk abt unhappy stuff...days went by and i'll be going to BATAM in hope to stay away from all troubles...in singapore! hope to have fun there! syafiqah is usaully mysterious about sme stuff..she refuses to tell me...when asked, she changes a topic...so yeah well, its alright...give her smetime....LIFE IS FULL OF HOPE!

well i guess this is oso another great looking one! we have a new memeber hahas! i don't noe how spell her name...kai-li nvm...i'll call her like that for the mean time! i must admit...this is one great photo! loves!

loook! rajes simply love the dummy she can't stop kissing it..well apparently to kissed it for 12++ times! she claims she's in loved with that ridiculous dummy! haha

well! this is great! having a formal pose! at least i look much better in this! hees!
(towards LEFT..tat's ME_)

well this is adorable! i guess ....havin fun-shot! eunice very gentle!(towards RIGHT...the girl with a victory pose and a shy smile...)

HAA I LOOK WEIRD! just simply having fun
rajes was doing CPR when i had a pose with her!

yo! people! big problem...very big problem...hais...talk abt friday...we had training till 5.30pm...than i went to BM with tamana...we ate our dinner quite a bit..well to say, the dat was like friday the 13th rite? the cursing day..i call it....i hated that day, i never thught it was REAL i meant bad luck....but well it got me into real DEEPSHIT....things i shuld not have done and did it...feeling horribly foolish and absolutely remorseful...don't wish to tell more. i just hated that day. ishould have gone home with the others! i shuld have gone home with syafiqah! than none of these would had happen! arrgggh!!! HATED that day...!!!! HATE it to the CORE! i feel like scolding vulgarities!
amyway enough of misery stories get to the real topic....LOOK!

whoa! its like years since i last updated this blog of mine. well, i had no choice i had to change my blogskin cause the skin got problem lehs hais...nvm yeah so i got into comp team i was like happy and a bit of guilty..i don't know why...hais... well i just went for the cross country trial last Wednesday... training was tough we had a first 15mins run that was horrifying!!! hahas tired, aiyoh than i got blisters siah! so paiseh ...but the thing was that my Monday comp team training clashes with the cross country training so guess i'll have to go for the Wednesday trainings! well, speaking of Wednesdays...last Wednesday, this week we went to Bedok reservoir the Temasak poly there..OMG! the track there was truly great! really big and huge man! i was running with the competition people it was a 4.01 KM run! i was arrhs!!!...4.1???!!! i could have died but yeah i was there runniong with this sec 1 by the name of carmel...not sure if correct but the pronounciation is there yeah...she was a great runner though she could run real quick, real fast! stuffs like that. we reach the place together cuz apparently we met up than started talking and jogging or rather running so we reach together than she told me to sprint..i was like half-dead so i couldn't bother that much..hees...but when i saw her sprint...i just did the same cuz the teacher was pushing me to go faster..hais....i felt jelly-legs after that! horrid! but my honestly speaking here i original main and purpose to join cross-country was because i felt FAT, i need to speed up my 2.4km run and get good-looking legs..the healthty way! hees=) i'm nutty aren't I? hahas! today i had public duty in school as there was speech day today went there as first aiders..well nothing out of the ordinary happen..just like that...usual stuff. well...it was intersting as well as boring...but i thought the CHOIR sang well! OMG! they were like angels from heven singing! i call them people with extra-ordinary voice(in a good way) ....hees the band is good too nice smoothing slighty classical-loud music...fabulous! hahas! well this sat we had public duty at siglap from 6pm-10pm. interestingly LATE....=) oh yeah i had my ballet open-house at Henderson CC last sunday....and my ballet exams are on the 4th of April! i hope i do well! looks like april's a busy month for me! there are 2 things to focus on my ballet exam and the SJ competition. also may is my mid-year rite? need to start studying in april to pass my mid-year..yup...sec2 is a crucial period as it determinds where you go in sec3. recently i brother's academic results was not really good.. and my mum had to see his teacher and principle once...regarding study issues...he's sec4 this year in express but he seems to have lose his interest in studies. he comes home at probably around 7pm and starts playing the computer until like 10pm-11pm...snce las week till now he's been doing that continously...hais he'staking his O' levels this year...because of my brother...my mum started pining high hopes for me...hoping i'll never end up like my brother which also i don't intend to....busy lately and last information here...! I'll be going to BATAM for the GOS(gift of sight) trip to help the myopia children there get these donated spectacles for free. I find this trip kinda meaningful because i really want to help the children or orphans there! i really want to see them!!!! this trip is from 18th march to 21st march....wed-sun....this is during the march holidays!~ not enough yet but i'll have to stop its getting late i need to get my beauty sleep there's training the entire day tomorrow! ned to have ample rest! will update the rest the next time! probably before the GOS trip! wish to bid farewell to all my friends!