YO!! updating of blog..XD today was a much better day than yesterday was...I was suppose to be ar class this morning but didn't make it in time..oppsie....oh well than I was suppose to be at school today at 12pm...apparently, I was late again, I reached at 12.40pm instead..oh well poor Eunice came on time..Rai was late too by the way heehee...saw her outside school and walked in together...Clement Sir was there too..so was Benjamin...[i tiink it spells like this] heehee...oh well nvm...did packing of orientation goodie bags...Rai and Clement Sir left about 2.40pm...than its only left with me, Eunice and Benjamin..Haha!! Than Sebastian came say about 3plus...than the chaos came in....we left sickbay about 4plus going 5pm....both me and Eunice together with Sebastian went to eat at the hawker centre..Eunice said she would follow me to Tiong to fix my Heels..but didn't cause she says it was late le..she has to be home le..than I told Sebastian to follow me lo..haha!! Anyway at Tiong we met Qian ai mam..she was like OMG?! Me with SEBASTIAN?! @ TIONG?! haha!! we look wrong bahs..but he's just there as my companion thats all...heehee!! dont tiink wrong worrhs..oh well that's about today le..tml's gonna an boring day again... sainx

Hey, OMG, I'm freaking out staying at HOME..today..Christmas EVE was good, our family had home cooked black pepper crab and chilli crab, we also had fried bee hoon, drank champagne...ate Haggan dazz ice cream- Belgian Chocolate and Midnight cookie Chocolate...hais...everything seems fine until Christmas night. I wreak a Big havoc and I'm soo dead...now, I'm being restricted to freedom from then on, I'm not even allowed downstairs, even from the short path from my house to my grandma's I even had to be accompanied to make sure I wouldn't run off to the shops near my house....Neither am I allowed to be home alone?! It feels like I'm in a girls' home or something! oh well not girls' home, at my own home. I thought my Family hates me anyway. or probably they don't they just detest me for being such a burden to them. I hate Family outings too cause I'm always the left out one, the unwelcome one. On the other hand my brother seemed to welcomed, so loved, so wanted. Is it because He is being the good one? That's why? I don't know..I've no idea at all anyway. Hais. Will being good actually be accepted? I wished. Maybe it'd be good if someday I realise that my own family now isn't at all my real family...that i actually had a wealthy family, a caring brother and a loving smaller sister..how great would that be? And I get everything little thing I requested for....especially everlasting Freedom..hais..If only it came true...hmms...Today I'm at home and I'm feeling just so lazy to do anything. Yesterday was better for me I guess..went over to my aunt's house baked CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES!! myself!! m7y auntie baked Kueh Lapis...hees..its eggy..Haha!! I MISS SCHOOL!!! I MISS ALL MY FRIENDS!!! I MISS SJAB!!! I MISS EVERYTHING WHEN I'M AT HOME!!!! I MISS MR THONG!! cause he's not going to be back in school anymore..hais...what am I to do when I meet problems?? The last time cause He is in my class, he could help me out when I'm down...but guess not anymore....hais....I THOUGHT...HE IS A VERY SPECIAL TEACHER. HE REALLY IS...HOW I WISHED HE COULD STAY LONGER.....

你知道吗。。。

一个

芭蕾舞者在原地旋转的时候必须先锁定一个目标才不会摔倒。。。

小的时候，我是看着妈妈和老师对我的期望而旋转，

希望有一天我能看着上帝旋转。

因为他是我的力量，

纯粹是因为他爱我。

Back here...long time since I posted..heehee. Past few days weren't really alright..Grandma was admitted to the hospital, everyone was dead worried about her....Had training but yesterday was cool...was an OMG thing heehee..=X [not obliged to say anything]....Lols..attendance didn't improved either...but! yesterday there was Kenneth! Haha!! but! Gleen was so Missing In Action...haha!! =P OK, about me being stupid that I'm a FAILURE and stuff..yes, although there isn't Perfection in me cause I did wrong things too...which makes me feel like I'm a failure cause I'm regretting..BUT! there are times when I felt that I wasn't at all a Failure cause what I did was right and it makes me feel that I've got the capability to do more and better!! Haas! Me and my super positive thinking today! Lols...Somehow nothing really spoils my mood today.


To Me:
Making Mistakes Means Giving Yourself a Chance To Be Replace By Others

Its been ages huh since I last uploaded my post...hmms..I'm feeling very very down now..I dont know why....I'm lazy to do work...school work...SJ work...everything. I just want to rot...haiyoo...just now I tried to do school homework online..I look at sooo many Chinese word...I read the passage than I don't understand leh...do first question than wrong le..than don't feel like doing le...hmms, I tried doing research for the past 2 days...I found nothing leh....somemore by this saturday need hand in worrh...I've no idea what to do now..I very blank lehs..how? Tried to call Eunice for help she didn't pick up phone..hais..now how? I later still got ballet class..hope my mood will be bettter...hmms...Ms Chandran overseas, still not back and Comp Team attendance is Horrible..yesterday's training was as bad as before...Rachel is on holiday, Rajes still can't be back, Priscilla's never back, Eunice is sick, Syafiqah's having fever, Randy has fallen sick too....Aishah's upset with training yesterday...tiink she's pissed...My mind's not working at all...I'm slacking my days away....everytime I tried to do something....it just never turns out good enough and its making me want to give up on it..which is not right. What to do now? The first thing on my mind now is I need help to complete my task....hais, I'm such a failure. Speaking of me being a failure...yeaterday Sebestian during training time said I'm such a Failure...It struck me...somehow I just kept quiet...probably I really am. No matter what I do..others is always so much better....I'm not trying to be better than others just at least I wished I wasn't a Failure that's all....

Hellorhs!! just return from BNCO camp sey..hais..I swore I could have just freaking die there it was just a total miracle i SURVIVED it! hahaha! LOLS ...tel you about it..

THEORY DAY 1

wah!!! I start theory day already sian to the max sio! early early go school somemre so pek chek need wear full-u still need stand in hot sun!! tsktsk. I felt horridly tired!! I DONT LIKE! but I find myself weiird lehs i DONT LIKE DONT LIKE in the end stil got go rite? hahaha! weird me sey..XD got briefing alot lecture..wah lecture lecture until I sit and rot...than want sleep sleep...HAHAS had ice-breaking...abit boring sio..only priscilla same platoon as me...damn sian. but hor than I realise that hor actually Rajes, Huiqi and Eunice Tan frm SJ same platoon! than I went like WAH!!! got so many HSS people but all never come de. HuiQi and Eunice nvm..Rajes same section as miie!!! than she didn't come!!! wah!! I was in Charlie 3...(my section) I damn sian los. lunch was the best time although the food was kind horrid but I was dead hungry so no choice either eat or die..so EAT LOS...than...LECTURE AGAIN!!! Leadership, HE was the lecturer sio! I swore I didn't sleep at all! Didn't felt sleepy!! HAHA! than it was the boring programme planning...the lecturer's quote..
"Too many cooks spoil the Broth??

or
The more the merrier??"
HAHAHA! tiink about it I want laugh sio..XD ok I'm bad..Flag painting...was a DISASTER our section flag was the ugliest! I have no idea why is other's that nice-looking but ours was weirdie =DD LAST PARADE!!! it just rocks los. you might have no idea how I lurv leaving Theory days! heehees I bad bad..hahaha! wah SJ have discipline master de worrh! so SHI SHANG! hahaha! WTH?! hahahaha!!! DM=adrian sir(DA SHUAI GE!!) =D


THEORY DAY 2

Today..ok I admit..it was much better...but its still Theory day...hais...wah the lecture was the "Too many cooks spoil the Broth??

or
The more the merrier??"
heehee! yeah its him..damn sian sio..I seriously was close to putting my heavy head on the table and plop to sleep..heehee Moi lecture was ok cause its MOI I'm most worried about...so yupyup..great..Than community song was interesting!! community songs rock! HAHAHAHa!!! learnt alot of cool songs sio...than my favourite happy ending again..LAST PARADE!!! XD

Camp day 1

The worst day can?! goodness me...hais...bought 2 bags there..so ding dei..hahahaha!! still bring pole! oh speaking of flag pole, I left on the bus to Xinmin than didnt bring los..than heehee had no choice see outside shop got sell anot..Nerissa Ma'm followed me than very funny outside never sell, we went to steal those broom one than pluck the pole out!!! HAHAHAHAH!!! SO EMBARRASING SIO!! hahahaha!! somemre its behind the market..!! hahaha!! hees ...day 1 already start day got abit of entertainment!! wahaha! but hor 1st day of camp is the worst los...stand at the parade square had to standardized everything so ma fan lehs! damn super PEK CHEK! really sian dao~ all the way!!! LOLS! Check bags was even the worst!!! they had us pour our belongings out than I was like wah!! people take so long to pack than pack mei mei than wah! everything fan come out! humph...bunk in is like seriously HELL! omg! had to be dust-free!! I was like siao ars?! Dust-free?! how clean! I'm not trained to clean rooms! than I went like what are cleaners for?! at least put them to use can?! but yeah the end had to clean than still need standardized where the tables and chairs to be placed at. bags, bottle, uniform covers, poles, chairs in how many stacks..need to standarized amongst the ambulance and nursings! serously sian to the max! thank goodness it was lunch already if not I will die due to exhaustion!! haas...had footdrill and thank goodness its raining! if not wah! hot sun sio! we went to the muilti purpose hall....we had footdrill in platoons and than tgt as a zone we had our footdrill..realise that we are supposed to follow Nan Hua High's timing for footdrills..hees was a disaster..after that had field activities, TENT PITCHING, FIELD COOKING, GADGET MAKING. the gadget making sounds like we're making weird stuffs oh well we made shoe rack. lols! tent pitching includes of the modern tent pitching and the olden tents called BAHSA..tiink spell like that..XD yup...field cooking was the most horrid activity plus we are eating it for dinner! sure wont have enough to eat de..sian...lucky after that our commanding officer(CO) had the S4 dept make supper for us..if not we'd starve! heehee...wah! the bathing..omg!! man!! it was like WTH?! we seriously no time to bath de lehs! than certain others so inconsiderate they bath so long..haiyo! make others have lesser time to bath! herh! lucky I get to bath if not, I COMPLAIN! hahaha! than lights out le..wah than hees I woke up about twice than I found out that aye how come charlie bunk the people suddenly got lesser...than chey! they went off withe their torch light for the fear factor thing. I also went..kinda funny lehs not scary de! only the satrting part when you blur blur wake up than officer tell you got this kind of thing than I scared..other than that..not scary le..lols! oh went back to sleep about 2am plus than 5.30 got fire drill!! wah! lucky I woke up about 5am than wash up cause 630am need fall in that's why..XD!

Camp Day 2
...........................

Camp Day 3
............................


I refuse to say anything....hmms,

I really hate being at home alone with my brother. He always gets violent to me when I'm alone with him. example just now...I had to do my powerpoint slides for BNCO MOI and had to do up Ms Chandran's PD records. which she is pissed with me nowadays....I asked my brother to let me use the computer cause I've got stuffs to do...He allowed me to used the computer but after a while he came back to me requesting for the computer back so as to use to play his computer games...I refused to telling him I really to do my work and tell tell him to use it at night also I would be going for camp for 3 days and He could have use the computer to play his games while I'm away..but logically thinking I'm never on the computer unless I've got work to do and He would always be the one on the computer for hours...then it feels so unfair cause why couldn't he being understanding enough to let me use a few hours doing my work?! He can have the whole time in the whole world to play his computer games but why can't I just use that few little hours for my work?! it not like as if I'm gonna use it for 10 whole hours right?! Also I've got and extra computer which doesn't belonged to me, it belongs to Ms Chandran which I'm supposed to returned it for Syfiqah but forgot for quite a few times...He wanted me to use that computer but I refused to..yeah I was stubborn...then we quarrelled....he even restricted me to onle 3hours of using the computer when I never restricted him to anything at all..to him he's the oldest so he has the right to scold me, beat me, restrict me to whatever he wants to. He even threatened to pushed me off the chair if he doesn't get to use his computer on time..OMG...my brother seems to be the main cause of me being unable to use the computer even though I could got to school to use but I cant be out of house without permission and my brother woukd never allow me out of house without my mum allowing me and he would keep the keys, hit me if I tried to leave the house...hmms...

Hey..hmms...aiyo...erm today and yesterday like that lorh...just abit unhappy yesterday dont know why. mummy is angry with me cause yesterday came home late wah she shout really loud at me sey..very scary...she still say if the next time after training I still don't come home on time after training than I can't go training le..!!! OMG...than she still say cause don't let me go cause I use training as an excuse to go out meaning in a sense after training will go out to malls and walk walk if not than will not be home on time...hmms..than like that lorh yesterday told her I need go school do powerpoint slides she scold and shout at me sey..than in the end I didn't go lorhs. The most I can go is go Beach road with Raihana and buy Camp items..than wah very unfair sey..my brother anytime also can go out no need ask de than I need even if I didn;'t ask my mumj intend to go out without permission my brother will still stop me de...than that time he fed up with me say I keep going out than also all without permission say I lie to him he still say He haven't yet beat mje for it...omg...He so fierce sey he very idoit..yesterday got comp team than I need leave house early to go marhs he woke up thanm refuse to let me out of the house I got no excuse to be out..I didn't say anything, go and bath than He kept scolding me say I got permission say Mummy doesn't know I'm going out than he say I not go school is go out say I use go school as an excuse...hmms..He still keep the key....but somehow lucky he saw the form that my mum signed the form..than he let mne out of the house..So irritating sey him..why must he care so much?! humph! whatever....hais

HEY!! I finally get to blog!! hahah!! Lols oh..went to BNCO last Saturday and...wah!!! very Difficult lehs!! Soooo Tough!!! They all so fierce sey...hmms...Dont Like but....I FOUND MY REASON TO LOOK FORWARD TO BNCO !!! Hahahaha!!! =p XD!! oh well shan't elaborate furthur...=X ...

Hmms..Saw my posting results today at Henderson gmail..yeah got into 3E4 oh well its kinda upsetting cause I didn't managed to do any better...saw other classmates of mine being in a way better class than me..=( oh well...hope its not because of results probably its cause of the subjects we choosed..I HOPE...(fingers CROSSED)..lols =)

Anyway...CCA's great I guessed but I thought I might've used a break though..Hais..wah I very very scared of BNCO's MOI test lehs!!! HOW HOW?! tsk tsk..hais..anyway wah!! I 'm restricted to only use the telephone for up to 30 MINS?!

OH MY GOD...its so what the hell! how has this stupid issue been brought out to CCA?! I seriously dont get the hell out of what has been going on!! HUMPH!! I prettty pissed abt this k? FReAky PeoPle lehs! herh! it just sucks alright?! I'm not going to mention this dumb issue anymore!!! After MOI today I didn't feel like going for Comp team tml lehs. It just felt tired that's all. Than went shopping with Rcahel and LALA today to tiong after Dinner..HEEHEES..=P
Found lots of things I could buy for Ms Siti's wedding this coming Sunday but I really couldn't decide what to wear. I looked weird in jeans but I cant wear short shorts there...but neither can I find a sutible DRESS to wear there! how?! how?! I'm having fashion fussines right now...Lols!
Oh well.. I sort it out with HELP! Hahaha!!! XD

OMG!! finally today's the last day for all the PoSt ExAm activities...!!! HAHAHAHA!! =p wah!! I very tired sey..my right arm pain sey...aiyooo..tsktsk..but nvm....Tomorrow's a better day lehs...got CCA...!!! lols..oh well then got Chalet meeting @ 3pm..should be ok bahs..tml..hmms..yesterday had in-line-skating..wah...fun fun at first...then went down the slope..soo fast..wah make me right arm so pain lehs..after that..haiyoo.today had Kayking..no better larh huh...hais..

oh oh!! yesterday I lose my wallet sey..!! went to play at the west coast park than took bus 175 back lefty my wallie there sey...aiyoo...went to the GEYLANG TERMINAL...than its not there they say must go to the interchange cause its the SBS TRANSIT one..not SMRT...i went like WTH?!! went to clementi interchange, got my wallie back...whew...(relieved man..) hees..=) yeah..got it back went home about 8.30pm!!!! aiyooo so late sey...tsktsk..

I nothing say LE...

Hey..!! today went for Dragon Boating..WAH!! today very very HOT!!...very tired..I sleepy sey after finish...tsktsk..=) lucky muscle never ache....today..hor I never bring EXTRA undergarments!!!! OMG!! hahaha!!! So embarrassing!! =X...heehee then others kept spraying water until we all wet wet de...Didn't intend to get wet de..hais..but did enjoy..lols plus this year streaming year next year all different class le...don't have the last time 1E4, 2E4 ready..SADS..not happy...lehs..Don't like..!!! NONONO!! hais..so yeah this time its our last year tgt as a class and the time we'll have post-EXAm-activities already...hees..not good hor..

Tmorrow got in-line skating..looking forward to it though..hees=) today feel like on THurSdaY ogt kayaking don't want go..don't want like today..but..thought about..for the last time's sake..yeah..I'll go....HEEs...very bad hor..lols..

Today half half..Half Happy...Half not happy...but most of it is very very very HappIE!!! today...XD

Hey..Back from the SJ chalet meeting at Changi...ok bahs...didn't do much lehs..cause cause Ms Chandran is tired so she didn't nag much!! hahahaha!! very bad hor...but yeah..there's still another Chalet meeting at Changi Biggins Hill next Friday..the 23rd...XD! staying over too...got do stuffs... Sickbay Stuffs.. had quite abit of fun though...but it isn't when Rajes and Eunice isn't there..I don't like the idea of them not being there lehs...

aND...alright in my previous post I thougth I sounded pissed..but I'm not..just upset...but..when I'm upset I don't really say it unless to certain others....but what I wrote is what I'm gonna say...if at that point of time you ask me..well, the initial feeling wasn't pissed...its just upset..and heartaching that's all..did cry and stuffs like that..but bet if I start talking about these issues or tiink about it...gosh..I might just start crying..XD

Looking forward to school tmorrow..have POST-EXAM-ACTIVITIES!!! hahahaha! enjoy sey... than than Friday got Chalet! StAy OveR!!! very very excited!! sey...trying very hard to look forward to Camps this holidays heehee...ohoh..

yesterday..I realise something...our SJ alumni are VERY VERY VERY good!!! wah..its like hor without the alumni...the Chalet meeting..would be such a disaster!! heehee everything also don't know..can't do...slides, notes..not organised...hees..wah! SJ almni people are so perfect sey..that's what I thought..lols...XD Hss SJ SIR very good lehs..the slides he doing lehs...ok larhs it sounds like taking advantage butbut its NOT ok...did request to do but people too good want help us do plus plus Sir scared we do wrong so yeah..GOOD HOR?

Back..- oh well..ExAmS OvEr, ReSuLtS hOrRiBlE !! hahaha!! true its definately horrible..hmms.. shan't post it on my blog cause its EMBARRASSINg!! heehee. CcA yesterday was not ok! its not good!! shan't talk about it..it sure does upsets me! These few days everything has been upsetting to me...
One minuTe you and I was fine and good then the NEXT minute, hell got loose-eVeRytHiNg was messed up!! WHY?!

One minuTe Mr Thong seems like he's forever staying then the NEXT minute he's going off!! WTH?! freakish~

One minuTe again, the both of you seems like you're going to the chalet and we're gonna have fun then the NEXT freaking minute, you're NOT going!!! why?!

I hate things when its like this...I hate surprises like that. It really does suck huh? ArrrGh! everything is driving me insane cause I was so caught up...if only, things are going back to NORMAL...I couldn't understand it. It feels like I'm standing alone. Everyone else is gone, and what in the world am I living for...

I f only I was given a WARRANTY card that I'll go to Heaven and meet all my loved ones then I'd die this minute. But then again..its a IF in this case...hmms. Life's HaRd..

Blogging again. Oh well the first day of my DEPRESSION WEEK..today's a little different..I'm kept in suspense..shoots!!! I really am dead huh..gosh..today went out and enjoy, mum got pissed off cause since last week even during exam periods I was hanging out didn't go home early. So, mum got pissed off and her daughter here is currently pissed off by mummykins DARLING sister!!@!*&#$@!! Oh for Christ sake's! why in the world do I have aunts that are like that?! Highly Irritating and a pain in the ass...heehee is rude huh..okok..shan't be rude but I really dislike my big aunt!!! She really is such a pain, a hindrance to my life and an extra human being that is almost a stranger to me..that flows about the same blood as I have(whatsoever)....!! Goodness Gracious ME!!! GOD! for pete's sake she should just get off my back!!!! ARRGGGHHH!!!!!!

Anyway...shan't talk about that horrid lady...today went to Cathay Cineleisure @ Orchad watched SURROGATES...cool movie...imagine everyone is a robot..that is controlled by a real human.....while the real human stays at home to control the robot that's walking out in the streets...NICE movie..although I don't really understand..but in general..that's about it. heehee OHOH! something nice I spotted today..HAHAHA! went to a mall just right infront of the Cathay Cineleisure...(couldn't rmb the name..) for lunch..than bumped into this sales guy who starts talking abput the product his selling...did some experiment on my fourth finger...and..IT SHINES!! hahaha! its not any nail polish..its just some buffering and cuticle care for nails..it really does shine!!! it feels like a piece of THIN GLASS ON YOUR NAIL!!! hahaha! it a littler exxagerating a must admit but hees that's what he say! LOLS..aND OmG..it cost 50 bucks with some cucumber and melon lotion..I WANT IT!!! but its too expensive not unaffordable..heehee..it cost 70bucks initially...but 50 was adiscount..he made me want to buy it..but..hees I'M BANKRUPT!! HAIYOO! sad lehs..oh well..life's hard when it comes to CASH AND EXAMINATIONS....

That GuY...is an AnG mOh!!! from AmErIcA...tiink soo..He's so HAND-SOME!!! hahaha!! the way he pronounces my name is sooo...american EnGlIsH!!! really love it!! hahaha! I wished I was born an AmErIcAiN...sometimes..went home late today about 5plus plus...mummykins grounding me!! so horrid! humph!!! don't like her and HaTe my biggest aunt! HUMPH!

HEY!! exams are finally over..and...I GET THE TIME TO BLOG..thanks to my brother I hardly have the time to get online..but I check my mail more than I blog!!~ hahaha!! lols..ohoh by the way..

I FLUNKED MY MATHEMATICS

that's for real and its expected..bet I'll flunked till really bad..for sure...bet SCIENCE is the next... omg...DIE DIE..can forget about taking POA next year..WAH!!! Nvm....don't talk about it le..enjoy abit of holiday...~ but hor..believe next week will be my DEPRESSION WEEK
really...shit...wonder what class I'd end up next year...what if I'm still in E4?!...I don't WANT!!!
NONONONO!!!!!!...hmms..anyway abit excited cause holiday will have 2 camps..BNCO and the C3 camp..sian..abit but nvm..aill have comp team training!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!~ YES!! hees.. okok shan't worry soo much le..XD
Enjoy first than say bahs!~ HaHAhA!

HaPpY fAmIlY !!~ HAHAHA!!!
HeY !! lOoK At My FaMiLy Of CaRe BeArS !!!!!!!!!

ThIs PicTuRe Is Great!!~ XD

i KnOw you..---TenDer HeArt!!!~ lols..XD
I bought it to My BaLLeT eXaMiNatIoN!!

SorRy HavE nO iDea wHaT you'RE caLLeD..sorry!!
(ps.I'll find out..XD)

GoOd lUcK !! hEy i bought GoOd lUcK to my BaLLeT eXaMiNatIoN!!

Blueie---GruMpY BeAr!!!

FamiLy of FoUr!!~

Isn't IT sooo ADOraBLE??!! HAHAHA!!~

Hmms...wah!!! I don't like FRIDAY!! no CCA lehs..that one nvm..still got thing on then can't go off cause need stay back!!!!! WTH?! WAH!!!! I don't like that FRIDAY!!!!! arrggghh!! alright at least Saturday and Sunday is good!!! when shopping with my M-a-M-a hee hee bought 2 cardigans!!! Lols! nice nice..but I stil want to buy MORE!!!! hahahaha!!!!!~ ohoh those black shorts were great and those slippers are good!!~ loLS!!! hee hee these few days got the F1 thing....swicth channels also the F1 things lehs..~ not really got show watch~ XD

Rushing my DNT !!!~

Best days in a week, SATURDAY AND SUNDAY!!~

pOST IS sHOrt..NtH tO RitE le..CauSE nTh MuCH H-a-P-p-E-n...

NOW, ITS FAKE WHAT-EVER I SAW WAS FAKE..! WTH...

Nvm...hmms now got mood to rite le...hmms ok...today no CCA, which means extra home-work!!!! wth..nvm...rushing out my DnT...hais...EOY is just next week and then I realised that just NEXT FRIDAY is already History exam...!! OMG..! I haven't yet prepare!!!!! LolS..plus plus I don't feel that I'm not ready to take my science exam!!! HOW?! OMG...! DIE DIE~ this time really die ready....plus plus I heard that MATHS paper 2 IS GOING TO BE TOUGH..MAN..oh gosh...hmms

oh well nth much to blog about today..

oh oh!!!!! I FORGOT..SOMETHING

SORRY-IRSHAD..! I FORGOT TO BRING YOUR BIRTHDAY PRESENT TODAY!!!! SORRY !!!!

I'VE NO MOOD TO SAY ANYTHING ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!

I just saw something that pisses me off !!!!!!

YOU better explain.....!!!

I'll not let this matter rest......not till you explain what happened !!!!!

Hey Guys...! I'm blogging again...and exams are near...everyone else is studying...hee hee but! I'd revise....actually what Mr Thong says is right...the answer to the question he pop-ed to me, he says...something like the person being dumped don't get to explain him or herself...then you tell the person the next day you didn't wan to talk to him or her..and saying there's something wrong...then you didn't say anything about it while the person that got dumped couldn't understand what's goin on cause its too sudden or whatsoever...but the main point is, these situation is just like me and aishah...before..and yup...obviously I'm the bad one..though...eventhough feeling sorry now cant help a thing but..I hope she isn't mad at me and I apologise...even if sorry isn't what she wants...others used to tell me if sorry could cure everything than I'd rather you say sorry a million times..but, it obviously doesn't. but..still SORRY....digging up the past wouldn't change a thing..but...I OWE AN APOLOGY TO YOU FOR A LIFETIME...AND THANK YOU...I WAS TAKING THINGS FOR GRANTED AGAIN...

Hey!!! Oh well today had TUTION !!~ again!!!!!!!! Oh gosh....maths yesterday maths again plus tomorrow science!!~ again!!!!!!! OMG...?! hais....tomorrow's a holiday and I don't wish to stay at home again hee hee boring larhs stay at home sey.....ohohTODAY'S IRSHAD BIRTHDAY !!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! TURNING 14 ALREADY HUH..WISHING YOU SUCESS IN EVERYTHING YOU DO !!!!!!!!

Okok...hmms other and tution and all eveything was great had lunch, breakfast and blah blah blah..lazy to wrote larhs...just as normal as any other days lorhs...hmms...oh oh yesterday was Great tooo !!!!!! hmms.....had a slight flu today, was bad and working hard on my maths-don't want to fail and yeah..Mr Thong told me to look up in the internet for some famous Ballerina..hee hees..I will..!!! soon...lols oh speaking of him...i think on thursday or the day before.... he asked me something about what I had learnt through the incident I had with aishah....hmms..I told him I was selfish...but he told me that its because I tend to runaway from my problems...

Than He pop-ed a question to me...he ask if i were to be in a relationship...whether is it BGR of just friends....he ask how does it feels like being dumped....? IDK- abt that though...he told me to just imagine think it like everyone else..how does it feels like....he said too he did tell me the answer after recess but he didn't..but NVM i'll find out..hee hees...just want to say a big THANK-YOU to my loved ones !!!!!!! THANK YOU....for everything you've done...although I'm a pain in the neck-as always....still THANK YOU and SORRY !!!!!!!

Yo..! hmms yeah sorry for the delay in update....hees while change my blogskin as the previous one has problems in updating that's why...hmms chnange for a simple one...LOLS exams are coming and yup ot seems like that entire world in srtessing up...anyway..everything's fine in my life..nothing's going wrong justa little here and there but..hees not to worry small matters shan't take them to heart!!!~ hahahaha!~ famliy's kind of irritating at times cried a little yeatserday cause brother and mummy irritate me and I don't like it..lols XD

anyway today's cca was good kinda slack had the air rifle thingy the thing was horridly tiring!! goddness me..omg gosh.. got a little upset today but yeah..small matters...can't be bothered..hmms and oh yeah.. Mam Ting Ting today out of nowhere appear...I went like WAH!!~ hahahaha!!! I thought she has attchment marhs till 9pm...didn't expect her in the morning but it was great to see her...lehs than i could have given her the COOKIES i baked...hais she didn't tell me..nvm... oh yeah another good news her timetable came out and she 's free on most fridays...! yeah!!~ lols..ohoh she'll be working in HSS too next week..hope to see her around in school...! XD oh stayed late today had fun in SJ room helped Sir willie think a little, cracked lame jokes abt stuffs the usual..lorhs..hmms ...went home but I took a bus 195..abt 1hr 30mins...sat there and think alot...surprisingly this time i wanted to cry but counldn't..

Hoping for the nest CCA day to come than could go school with Mam Ting Ting..! very long never see her, never bond les..~ hee hees...XD

MISSES..and thanks to MS CHANDRAN and Mr THONG...

the TWO best teachers i thought to be..in HSS ever..who taught me alot..

Yo...hmms its been years since I last updated my blog lehs..and yeah blame my bnrother larhs kept hogging the computer lorhs...whatever larhs...hmms had FEVER lehs!!~ since tuesday...was send home early morning came school yesterday had to stand at the back of the class lorhs cause didn't bring my worksheet and yesterday had MOI...I did horribly....had ballet class at pasir ris too reach there damn late larhs its like class gonna end....les...hmms..wasted my trip all the way there....at least still got practise a little larhs....got my ribbons..too.

hmms..and yeah today's my ballet exam...27th august at crown centre...woke up in the morning felt my back aching like hell...today I felt useless again...hais...didn't do as well as I expected during the exam..hais...barre work wasn't as good..center work isn't that good either lost my balance during one of my A-DASH..no idea how to spell...I also almost lose my balance during my DA-VAL-PAYS...no idea how spell either...hmms...my turns were ok...manage to keep my balance and yeah my FREE ON-SHA-MONDS...weren't that good either my brain seems to have gone off when told to do my A-SOM-BLES...hais...FA-MEI...i forgot too..lucky I wasn't the first to do if not I wouldn't be able to copy...hee hee..but I'm the first in the group of 4..lehs...so unfair lorhs..herh..every year also like that de...had FEVER after my exam...temperature rose all the way up to 38.6 degree celsius..hais was suppose to vist my child care but...was too sick to travel there went home to sleep and temperature went down...thank goodness..hmms thanks to a certain someone....THANK YOU...thank you for everything... for today....

Sorry to RAJES...couldn't accompany you today..I'm sorry...and anyway tml has cca was suppose to be excited but this time I'm not excited lehs..very horrid abt tml today...a certain someone had to leave really early...SADS...hmms..ohoh something to happy about..MAM TING TING will be back to HSS tml lehs...XD finally she has time to be back really miss her..lols XD last week saw MAM HWEE ING..wanted to say hiie to her but couldn't was busy..sdas...hope she'll be back soon...really miss them..LOTS..XD last week saw mam ting ting too...was full of smiles!!~ hee hee the funny thing here Mam Nerissa got a little jealous there...hahahaha!!!~

speaking of the both of them hors...tiink that day went to catch a movie the where got ghost show...got shocked by MAM TING TING LARHS..HAIYOO...i learnt something that day never to watch horror movies with people as playful as her cause she'll scare you even if the movie is a comedy..hahahahaha!!! no offence here...had fun...that day...wah she make me speechless lehs until I had to apologise...hee hee..XD

Looking forward to TOMORROW...XD

To whoever who hates me alright....WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU WANT ME TO DO??? just tell it out alright instead of spamming and stuff....anyway I don't see a reason why you should do this despite the fact that you're standing up for aishah...if you aren't happy with me why not you bring you and your friends over we'll talk things out and settle in peace alright instead of doing lowdown acts like spamming and not telling who in world are you....I believe you didn't want me back with aishah either cause yeah as what you think she's too marvelous for me...if i can't do this or that what do you suggest than....I never once regret the path I took and I'm not what you make me out to be....not what you said as I'm dumping old friends for new..or whatsoever....its the truth that I did choose others over you this bunch of people but to me others are more worthwhile than you this bunch of people and the others I'm refering to are my true friends...I suppose you haven't got any TRUE FRIENDS have you??? that is why you aren't able to think in my point of view...the friends you have now some may be long-lasting some may not be... but the problem is you....your so called long lasting friends may too leave you one day as you're never true to them...maybe you are now but gradually you'll realise that they...your bunch of friends now are probably not your true friends...no offence here....why not you'll tell me what to do than....I'm not trying to say you shouldn't interfere or stand up for her i understand that you're just doing what a friend would do....anyway yeah you WIN....you totally prove to aishah that you're probably a true friend of hers but....for now...and...you made me realise how lowdown you are....that you have to resort to down and dirty huh? whatsoever....you could take that as I'm giving you a chance to prove to her your worth-ness your capabilities....and you ought to thank me that i made her realise it fast that I'm probably not the kind of 'true' friend she's after...I WAS ENCOURAGED TO END THINGS FAST EVEN IF I HAVE TO DO UNPLEASANT THINGS AND...I NEVER ONCE REGRET WHAT I DID....thanks I-R-S-H-A-D.....herh

hmms..hiie PEOPLE...LOls..I thought my science teacher is really that motherly....hees...i tiink its yesterday bahs certain things happen in our class after recess...during science class...the OM came up and reprimand certain students in our class for locking Mrs soong outside the class...I tiink so...smething like that...and...yeah she was angry...after apologosing certain people became being kinda rude to her and yeah...she flared up....FOR THE FIRST TIME....never seen like that before..got really scared....she's the kind of person that often gets despised by certain people who don't understand her...and she's different in a unique way..i must say....she often take the blame and compare herself to other teacher of her incapability......she kept saying sorry and stuff it made me feel bad....haas....hmms..oh well.....it takes quite some time to understand one's good intentions...she also kept reapeatinglike..."SO SORRY, I'M NOT AS GOOD AS MS CHANDRAN NOT AS FUNNY AS SHE IS...." I don't like the fact that she is self-reproaching..... its not her fault and she's trying her best to make her lessons interesting...but some irritating people in our just simply don't apreciate her intentions and often show disrespect to her...I DON'T LIKE THAT...she don't deserve this kind of treatment, she's a teacher and she ahs been really lenient to those certain idoits in our class....and they took it for GRANTED...how could they??? its really mean.....although she clearly knows that certain students don't like her and talk about her behind her back she tolerated all these nonsense and tehy took it for granted...and I DON'T DENY THAT I HAD GOSSIP ABOUT THAT ISSUE BEFORE...oh well that's past..and I'm starting to regret it yeah~....*everyone deserves a chance...* and certain people just refuse to give her that chance....hais..NVM...irritating idoits.....I'm surprised that she doesn't burst a blood vessel just by giving in to them..ALWAYS...*herh*
Quit talking about that issue.....AISHAH~ she's recently piled up with problems...and the only way I can help her is by informing Ms Chandran....but I'm afraid she might be upset...she doesn't want to inform her about it....but..I WANT TO HELP HER..seeing her so depressed..it really makes my heart ache.....I know I should have my stand in this kind of situation....but..yeah~ I'm confused.....seriously...~
Today..kinda horrid day though....not really that horrid....*if YOU're reading this....*
-SORRY, I really want to tell you but....I can't bring myself to....the words just drifted to my mouth but I just couldn't say it....I'm afraid of your reaction and what will you tiink of me....I could rite it all down but..I can't bring myself to show it to you.....I....I'm sorry.....I know you are seriously horridly curious....please believe me that I really want to tell you everything but at times I just am not courageous enough to say it all out let alone write it all down for you....I love you so much that I couldn't bear to let you know this ugly truth....you said you want to know....you'll be surprise and shocked...and these two words are not just written for the sake of writing...seriously.....forgive me....blame me for everything alright....sorry again..even though sorry isn't what you'll want to hear but I still want to say it....SORRY....to euu....*Loving someone isn't that easy....that's cause you'll soon realise that you are afraid to tell her everything...especially when its ugly...*

Hmms....its really cool huh...felt really blessed and cherished...even though sometimes things happen and made me hate life and felt like dying but thinking of the people who love me I'd never want to die...I guess the reason for making me hanging on to my pathetic life now are the people that love me and never gave up on me...I really love them and I finally understand when people say that LOVE CAN'T BE EXPLAINED...that's cause when I try to tell someone how much I loved her...It'd be very hard to explained...hmms...=)
Anyway who-ever is the LESSON FROM THE LEPER...thank you very very much!!!~ it's really comforting to hear that from you(the unknown)...LOls...looks like you are really secretive about your real identity huh...oh well...Its lovely that you care...THANK YOU...~ *looking forward to your next post...!XD*
Have no idea how to continue...what can I rite??? oh well I'm slightly irritated by my brother and I don't wished to discuss this stupid issue any further...whatever....love the song a certain someone sent me...XD...THANKS~ thanks to SJ I get to know all my real close friends there....GOD gave me a special gift on my birthday...ALL OF YOU AND A CERTAIN SOMEONE...even if I didn't get a gift on my last birthday-*(maybe I did, But i couldn't rmb..if anyone who gave me a gift read this PLEASE DON'T BE OFFENDED...I didn't meant to FORGET..SORRY IN ADVANCE..)* but I got you-all unknowingly...its fate...my gifts are always so mysterious...I LOVE YOU-ALL...loves..always...

Hellorhs people...Lols..hmms all's fine now I guess despite the fact that I got irritated by my mum yesterday and I was horribly stubborn...hmms oh well that's me...! and...Friday was kind of a peaceful day...I guess...all was peaceful until I went home and there's a awkard silence between me and my aunt...whatever...hmms...had a horrible time taking the sec 1's though and I admit I was in a bad mood the day before friday and yeah...I'm sort of impatient in teaching....anyway sorry....hees...LOls and on that same day we went to buy stocks JOO YEE, RAJES etc...went with her and yeah the wednesday post...sorry...patched up somehow and I somehow got scared of her...she freaks me somehow...became so fierce and...the feeling is so cold...I guess that's why I'm afraid...of her...the thought of her going with me that day seriously shocked me a little...but it turned out fine..hmms...glad that its ok...!!~ LOls...but for a while she sort of changed into another person a sort of cold one...and she has an aura around her that gives people shivers at times...I guess it has to do with SJ that's why..hmms oh well...but seriously if I'd ever quarrel with any senior I'm close with is definately because of SJ..that's cause that's the only link we have that connected the both of us....and on that day I asked myself HOW IT FEELS LIKE TO BE AFRAID...I guess its more than just normal afraid..what I actually meant is the feeling of not being able to find a certain someone and you started panicking...I hated that feeling...when I'm unable to find a certain someone and it made me realise that she knows everything about me but I knew nothing about her...its like whenever I'd go off and cry or emo ahe'd be able to find me... but when she does that I couldn't find her..and I got really scared...but what's the use it shows how much I don't know about her...hais...its sickening...I hope anyway that we wouldn't quarrel again...leaving SJ out of the picture....and oh on FRIDAY my co-form teacher is leaving school she's going of to study in university and I cried that's cause when she says her first co-form class was us...2E4...hugged her and I cried..got all of us a keychain specifically carved our names onj it and it made me cry more than ever..I MISSED HER...and LOVES always....XD

hiie...hmms...sometimes I think my English teacher is just soooo COOL....somehow....and somehow I think that 2e4 gets the best teachers.....! LOls....the teachers always happen to be so caring..in 2e4 and thank goodness for that....I guess sometimes cdertain people in my class just simply thought that our English teacher is just simply weird and overly dramatic....whatever...sometimes I get too carried away indulging in gossips about our English teacher...BUT...until that day he handed me a BIG BOOK and until I saw the tagg in my blog....(I thought that tagg sound so HIM).....maybe and I hope it is..!~ He's just simply unique.....in his own COOL way..haas..I thought....maybe he's the second generation of...erm...another caring teacher but it happens so that he's a male...hahahahas!!!~ oh well that's great and oh I read something from him and I thought that it simply sound so TRUE...mostly..haas....LOls....problems have been occuring lately and I think too much but I thought I'm a burden to certain people...a trouble and I don't understand WHY WOULD PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW THINGS THAT THEY KNOW WOULD UPSET THEMSELVES?...is this some psychological barrier??? and I too don't understand why friendships are like that in a sense...FRIENDSHIP is suppose to MAKE(s) PEOPLE HAPPIER BUT IT CAN ALSO BREAK THEIR HEARTS....??? well why? are we indulging too much in friendship to a certain extend that its heart-breaking enough??? to leave a friend...? oh well, I guess so...hated that fact....and I JUST realise that in friendship...there are bounds to have quarrels....and I too JUST realise I can almost burst a blood vessel talking about ONE issue that linked the both of us....together...the SIMILARITY...I found out that we COULD almost quarrel...for the first time.....over a single issue....

SO EXACTY HOW LONG IS 'JUST' ???
*similarity....*

if anyone can actually figure out..that 'one' must have really know WTH i've been blabbering on.....

hiies people!!!! Lols...anyway..about my previous post...about the group project...it seems to be much better now somehow they seems to be working together now, it looks more like a group....but not all memebrs are doing things exactly....anyway yeah...like that lorhs..seriously i got so damn pissed off...before until now...and i just realised that when i'm seriously unhappy about certain things i can really be very direct....but yeah that's me...even though being too direct at times can really piss people off but i belive in that fact that 不喜欢就直接一点，干嘛拖泥带水，拉拉扯扯? 这样岂不是让 自己更痛苦？
anyway enough about project work....its fine anyways....and oh me and aishah....hmms....just last monday we sorted things out..but it seems like that was just the surface not the in-depth....i'm still feeling horrid about the distance...oh alright it sounds really bad and stuff saying these....but yeah..its still not solved anyways and I don't noe how to go about solving it....about syafiqah it seems there's alot of misunderstandings and looks like things are looking up now...we are going to be back like before!!!!~ and I understand that sometimes she does certain things and it seems like she has to do that....so I don't blame her....yeah...=）
Also at times I think that my family just hates me.....especially my biggest and smallest aunts....which also includes the peole staying with me at home that disgust me so much....they are always so cold in a sense they scold you and pick at you for every TINY LITLLE WEENY mistake you make....and they never cease to stop nagging and irritate you...just like my brother he just beat me days ago.....whatever!!!~ I seriously hate coming home to my family and the shack place I'm living at right now.....AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
I wished I could earn alot of money in future and move out of this shack as soon as possible....and away from a violent brother....I swear that in future If he'd be in any troubke and if he'd come begging to me on my knees to save him..... i hope i'd just sweep him aside....that idoit...I'd never forget how violent he used to beat me for the past few years....me, always in his mercy crying for help....for GOD to send a lightning and kill in an instant.....for my ego always stepped under his feet...and it'll never happen again...NEVER WILL IT EVER EVER HAPPEN AGAIN....call me a heartless idoit or a mean cold-blooded person....I don't want to give a DAMN.....people who call me that or tiink that way are people who'll never understand that pain and everything I might have gone through...which they haven't....these people might people taht don't understand me and might be those whose parents really love them, they have a complete family while I don't...they have relatives that are married and can't bother much about other families whioch is a good thing, unlike my aunts and uncles all not married and they seem to have nothing better to do except to irritate us and poke their nose into our family affair...yeah...maybe they care...that's the OBVIOUS REASONS AND THE NOT SO OBVIOUS???? they are busy-bodies and just want to find topic to talk about and pick on us endlessly....this is what I hate man...a bunch of idoitic creatures..whatever!!!~ HERH!!!

yo!!~ oh alright....looks like things are looking up now!!~ XD except for the fact that I'm stuck with my project group...seriously I wasn't really happy about the fact that I was unable to do individual's work....NVM forget it....really felt so pissed and wanted to cry when I'm HELL stuck in there!!!~ oh for GOD'S SAKE!!!!!!!!!......WTH?! it seriuosly feels like I'm spoon-feeding them no....actually me and my able-partner are like spoon feeding them....maybe its partly also our fault we couldn't get them to do work....but its really UNFAIR....!!! I seriously hated the fact that certain people who just sit and talk amongst themselves....did NTH, just stare at you with their blank faces expecting a DAMN answer out of you...!!!~ AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!~ alright, maybe they did something....but its the fact that me and my able-partner are doing the MOST work...and they gain marks for just doing that LITTLE DAMN something...!!!! Not to say the last NEWater report both me and my able-partner had to do PRACTICALLY everything...!!! and I mean EVERYTHING alright....its the last important report I remembered I almost burst a BLOOD VESSEL from doing that...till 3am!!! like seriously WTH?! and what's worst is that our report is one of the worst REPORT!!! the entire class had written!! I went like OMG TIMES 10 !!!!!!!! Is it that BAD?!?! oh well alright.....it can't be done ALONE....*HERH*
And guess what what could be more worst then a HURRICANE SWEEPING PEOPLE OFF THEIR FEETS....? is ME still stuck with the same people as a GROUP!!! and that totally FREAKS me out....! why?! seriously...WHY the SAME people?! oh well...finish COMPLAINING...
hmms...ok if all these sound mean.....and horrid..but its TRUE...that's what I'm tiink-ing abt....would like to APOLOGISE....anyway....hope all these GETS OVER AND DONE WITH....I wouldn't want HISTORY to reapeat itself AGAIN!!!!~ NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!
And some-how kind od miraculously.....things happen to be better especially in FRIENDSHIPS....really elated when I heard that next FRIDAY...CCA'S resumed!!!~ XD finally no school-work!!!!!!!!~ LESS HOME-WORK LESS STRESS...!!! hmms..oh well...really worried and miss-ing RAJES....she's down with FEVER the last time I saw here..and I haven't seen her for 2 days or more...it feels like 100 YEARS of moaning just freaking PASSED....Lols and so is SYAFIQAH....heard she's also sick...looking forward to meeting them soon.....really want to say and explain things to certain people....and looking back...when was the last time in my blog I wrote Fiqah's NAME??? kinda long yeah???~ still in the midst of CLARIFICATION....hmms...

yo!!~ OMG..its been days and it felt like years to me...gosh!!~ oh for heaven sake's school reopen say last week...? yea...and we can't have cca for 2 weeks or more..hell knows...nvm anyway just last week was SJ day we couldn't have our parading and stuff that's cause got the DUMB h1n1...wahlao...hmms we wore our uniforms hees....suzannah and I read the SJ message...GOSH!!~ I sound weird...so mono-tone...seriously..nvm...hais....oh well....and yeah homework's piling up.....GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME....oh well....things happen alot in just mere 2 weeks...had to do lots of stuff now...lols SJ stocks are 90% ready!!~ XD "my head" will be spared from scoldings... poor her......all that's left to do is some admin stuff and finally I finished my english report and my space shuttle project which is due tml....lols 2 burdens are down...!!!~ school's getting better though...although homework is kind of a problem...hees....and oh just last FRIDAY was my form teacher's B'dae.....Ms Goh...=D wrote a letter to her passed a letter to her yesterday....hmms...certain ppl got sick..wonder how's she....didn't want to call her guess she wouldn't like it either....she hates me....everytime when talking about her....my heart hurts so much...sometimes I think people that knows you inside out often hurts you the most...in whichever way....and sometimes people whom you are not close too tends to care for you more then certain people whom you once love and care for.....伤害你最深的人不一定是你的仇人，有时候会是你身边的人。。。I don't understand it..why is this so......forget it....yesterday at bus with weirdo and rajes..we went to buy stocks....and i was thinking about certain stuff..it made me want to cry.......haas....today's a normal but kinda horrid day for me!!~ lols will stop here for today.....and oh ballet lessons are getting better just that i can't do my turn very well and am worried what if i can't catch up and fail inter-found??? haas....

Oh well...today's kind of...actually not that bad either...today went to class to collect my results...MY GRADE 4 results the previous exam I took....guess its not bad..but...nvm... anyways today before I left house I told my mum that there was no class today....because I had to collect my results...and I told her I was going out with my friend today....she sort of flare up that's cause she thought I was lying to her about me not having class today...she thought I'm gonna skip class and go out....it made me cry man!!!!~ and what's worst was what she said to me straight into the face.... it made me cry immediately....sort of hated her for that....oh well I just stormed out of house...gave her a stare before leaving....thought I was horrid but...at that moment..at that point of time...I really hated her to the core...pushing away the fact that she's my mum.....sometimes I'd wish she was DEAD....it sounds evil and unfilial...but yeah..that was first thought that came into my mind....I TRULY FIND IT HARD TO LOVE YOUR MOTHER....at times....speaking of class...I went to ballet today to expect a whole lot of parents outside..but to my amazement....THERE'S CLASS GOING ON TODAY!!!~ i swear i totally had no idea about this!!!~ I thought just last tuesday(oh well I actually meant the TUESDAY that just past)...she said there's was no class..well actually she didn't say it straight from her mouth...certain people asked her about class this sunday..she just said yeah..but I clearly heard certain people asked her if we needed to wear our leotards and tights for class she says....NO....and heard thenm asking if its true..she went YEAH....wonder if I'd hear it wrongly..hais..and yeah there's class....so paiseh!!!~ but all went well after all...she was kind of unhappy about the fact that I was late AGAIN for 30 MINS-that makes HALF AN HOUR!!!~ oh well....and oh she was saying about herself being unable to contact me on my handfone....I guess that's when the others are notified about there's class this SUNDAY...and that FREAKS me out.....blame my MUM!!!~ She refused to return me my fone....nvm....so, there's class and after class...stayed to collect my results...and forgot to mention...my mum came to HENDERSON CC to find me....she came to ask if my results were out yet..and I told her I had class...told her to go off to church...the fact was I didn't want her to sit with me to get my results...oh well...anyway she came also to ask if I wanted money for my outing....swore that my heart totally melt...she's like back to her tender...gentle...loving self....but when I thought about the fact that she must be here to see if I'd skip class....and know what? MY HEAD SAYS NO AND MY HEART SAYS YES...or rather MY HEAD SAYS YES AND MY HEART SAYS YES...too...I don't know...I have no idea....why is it always me doubting her or actually the both of us doubting the other....oh well.....nvm. speaking of results....I got 73 MARKS AND ITS LIKE 2 MORE DAMN MARKS TO DISTINCTION!!! I went out the door and totally screamed my head off!!!~ ITS LIKE 2 MORE MARKS!!!~ wahlao!!! WHY WOULDN'T THE EXAMINER JUST GIVE ME 2 SYMPATHY MARKS!!! WHY?!?! I swear I felt like dying when I realised I was just GOD-DAMN 2 marks away!!!!~ AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!~ freak it!!~ forget about it..... What's BEEN done is DONE!!!...NO POINT CRYING OVER SPILLED MILK...LOls~ after that went out... .felt SORRY to a certain SOMEONE....sorry...SORRY FOREVERYTHING.....SORRY!!! with sincere apologies....anyway what we planned didn't proceed well..though....SORRY to a certain SOMEONE!!!~ but thank you anyways...for being to patient with everything....THANK YOU!!!~

Hmms....today's the 27th of JUNE 09...~ and OMG times 10!!! My other holiday assginments have yet to be done!!! Arrrgh!!! WTH!!! nvm...and oh tml gonna be a long day....hais tml I going collect my grade 4 exam RESULTS!!! it spells trouble huh? Goodness Gracious ME....and yeah there's this GSS...!!!!~ omg....I want faint les...~ hais THE GREAT SINGAPORE SALES!!! well yeah it freaks me out having to think about it..and the fact that my mum's controlling me about what I'm gonna buy...!!! oh god...for pete's sake!!! I could have died....and kinda excited over the fact that school's gonna reopen....that's cause I'm HELL bored at home!!! and I'm kinda grounded..sort of thing....and the worst is I'm tryin to sneak out of house!!! FREAK that fact...LOLS and yea...speaking of sneaking out...erm...just this THURSDAY was suzannah's B'dae and the previous day was shu yu's B'dae...well yea...I didn't get them gifts..was BANKRUPT!!!!...NVM...but I managed to get a gift for DEAR Aishah AKA ii-ee-sha....LOls!!!~ anyways we went vivo skypark..had fun there...hees..well I didn't bring extra clothes...so..hmms..like that lorhs...and the people there ahd me drenched in WATER!!! oh my goodnees gracious me.....oh well...NOT SUPRISED....that's cause the people I know are...like that...LOls. interesting people...haas...and oh I BROKE A LEFT HIP!!! hahahahas!!!~ kidding...and yea sometimes I tiink RAJES have TOO much energy in her...now, that's scary....and a particular person whom is known to me as an EVIL VILLIAN,.....should just be less energetic...too...the particular one is WAY PAST MORE ENERGETIC THAN RAJES!!!~ well....that's alright...that's cause its her...~ hahahahas!!!~ oh and today's a SATURDAY....long day for me....hmms had tution early morning ahd to rust to church and I'm rotting there....but it gives me a funny feeling....I don't used to feel irritated sitting there unlike today...I have drifted so far apart from the lord....and I want to be back with HIM but...I don't know how....and somehow I felt outcast and didn't gain any acceptance from the people for my existance there..had an awkard feeling....and today I was handed a booklet...it's the 40 DAYS of praying kind of thing....its like talking to GOD and stuffs like that....oh well....its QUIET TIME....to say...I'm kinda interested in this 40 DAYS of praying kind of thing....and I just realised I missed certain activities...like the ONE LOVE AWAKENING....by PHILIP MANTOFA....its a conference from the 18th-20th of JUNE....almost all the youths and teens in our church went and they had sharing today...I can tell that they actually learn alot from it...and I seems to have regret not being aware and not going for it....and speaking of it....we had our youth camp and during worship time....certain people started LAUGHING right after CRYING and carried on laughing NON-STOP....it sounds rather scary but its actually a kind of JOY the lord gave you..oh well couldn't explain it but its cool....its called THE HOLY LAUGHTER....not everyone can have that...its really cool and I hope I could experience it too...it sounds rather impossible...but yeah...haas....

Omg~ its been ages since I last updated my blog...omGOSH...but its going to the end of JUNE holidays les~ hais there's still tons of work not done hais....and next week gonna's be a busy week cause next week has SJ day training and certain people has NAC-LI camp then hmms...I need enjoy life for the entire NEXT WEEK!!! and i've NOT done my Homework finish larhs!!~ haiyooo...and yea on the 16th JUNE was AISHAH'S B'DAE !!!~ loves but the worst is I couldn't even get out of house to celebrate with her...felt so bad man!!!~ and yeah recently I was kind of BANKRUPT!!!~ LOLs...can't buy present for her but will make it up to her soon...sorry...T_T oh...last week on Friday I had my YOUTH CAMP at saint andrew's village...cool and clean place man!!!~ the toliet...the floor..the tables and chairs...the FOOD!!!~ THE BEST!!!~ XD on the last night before we break camp we had BUFFET!!!~ loves!!!~ it was like OMG!!! we even had chocolate eclairs lehs!!!~ but it reminds me of POOR mam nerrisa...poor little thing...hees...got officer camp...no good FOOD...no good SLEEP...hais..but pratically my concept of camps are NO GOOD FOOD AND NO GOOD SLEEPS...guess this time its a luxury camp for me....not for her..hais poor thing....Oh well....recently there seems to be problems going on...and I've been thinking alot too..and the worst is...I can't find ANSWERS instead I get more QUESTIONS...then I expected....but I do really hope all this will really end fast....anyways... WANT TO THANK ONE WEIRDO WHOSE ALWAYS BEEN BY MY SIDE SUPPORTING ME IN WHATEVER WAY!!!~

hiies!! hmms..I'll be bored to death for the next few weeks! arrgh!!~ nvm...oh guess for the next week the upstairs seniors will be having camp..this week the seniors and upstsirs seniors also..poor thing....lucky me no camp but...i'm bored at HOME!!!~ freak it!! nvm...mum went with me to collect my REPORT BOOK...Omg...yea but death day...but guess its all fine now..but when she went home that day she totally blow her top!! and yeah..~ that's my MUM...anyways don't talk about what happen that day le larhs...not interested to talk about it...XD urm...these few days nth talk about le...that's cause nth much happen......okok guess i'll stop here...will try and update soon...sorry

All of the 14 people must do this quiz, unless he/she doesn’t have a blog .Write the names of14 people you can think off the top of your head, then answer the questions.

1. Aishah

2. Rajes

3. Eunice

4. Mam Nerissa

5. Joo Yee

6. Harvinder

7. Irshad

8. Panying

9. Evelyn

10. Alicia

11. Sangheetha

12. Huiqi

13. Suzannah

14.Shu yu

How did you get to meet 7 ? -Through SJ in HSS..

What would you do if you and 13 never met?- erm...probably i wouldn't noe she's that interesting and adorable at times...! hahahas!!

What would you do if 1 and 12 date?-guess I'll tiink its kinda adorable...not bad..haas i'll faint..LOLS

Have you ever seen 14 cry?-Nope..I hope too...kinda interested to see her lang bei de yang zi...haas aren't I evil??

Would 4 and 11 be a good couple? - NO!!! they have deep misunderstandings....nonono...its insanity if its REAL...

Do you think 11 is attractive?-whoa..attractive..hmms..ok..what else can I say??? [no offense]

What's 2's favourite colour? -Blue bahs..

When was the last time you talked to 9? -Yesterday afternoon...

What language does 8 speak?-English and Chinese

Who is 13 going out with? -no idea as far as i noe..she's currently single..

What grade is 12 in? -secondary 3

would you ever date with 10? -we meet up..duh..she's a girl..my gosh...

Where does 5 live? -Near BM..opposite MAC..

What's the best thing about 3? -She listens without asking, knowing and judging..that's what's good about her...she'd GREAT!~

What would you want to tell 10 now? -I miss you always!!! Hope to meet up with you soon!!! LOLS!!~

Whats the best thing about 8? -she's adorable and kiddy...although she's over 10 but she's fun to play with...

Have you ever kissed 5? -maybe on friendship day or was it before??? no idea...forgot le or i didn't at all...

What was the best memory you have with 7? -when we had lots of fun at MAC before all problems started....

When's the last time you're going to see 6? -No idea for as long as I remember her...

How is 14 and 12 different?- Erm that I don't really noe..they click off well...

Is 6 pretty? - Whao..no comments ...maybe bahs..she's kinda ok...LOLs

What was the first impression of 11? -She's very enthusiastic and daring...

How did you meet 5? -Through SJ, through the fact that she's my HEAD and in HSS..

Is 1 your best friend?- Duh!! yes!!!~ that goes without saying..hahahs!! love you more=]

Do you hate 12? -NO!! why in the world would i ever do that?! LoLs..

Have you seen 4 on the last month? -sure I did...!!!~ she rawks!!!

When was the last time you said to 3? -our thoughts about everything that's going on...

Have you been to 5's house? -Nope..if I could I would have gone..

When's the next time you gonnna see 10? -Heaven knows..but I do hope soon...

Are you close to 13?-Not really we are friends..haas

Have you ever been to a movie with 4 before?-erm..no...

Have you ever gotten into trouble with 8? -Nope

Would you give 2 a hug? -Definately!!! love to!

When have you lied to 3? -sometimes when I didn't want her knowing certain stuff..but I guess she knows it all now.

Is 1 good with socializing? -Yea..kind of she's GREAT...!!!

Do you know secrets about 9? -Nope she has nothing to hide...

Describe the relationship between 12 and 14. -Erm..close friends...

Best thing about your friendship with 9? -Both had lots of fun in class and school...!!!

What's the worst thing about 6? -Not oblige to say...

Have you ever had a crush on 12? -NO!!! I'm 100% perfect women...!! hahhahas!!~

Does 14 has a girlfriend or boyfriend? -no idea..girl-friends..yes...her cliques...

Have you ever wanted to punch 1's face? -INSANE!!! NO! never in my life!!!!~

Has 2 met your mother? Nope...

How did you get to meet 3? Through SJ..in HSS..in CLASS..and the fact that we are on the same boat...

Did you ever physically hurt 3? -got..when we play...haas

Do you live close to 7? -No bahs no idea where he lives...

What's 8's favourite food? -So far I tiink food from MAC...??? haas no idea...

What kind of car does 1 has? -has no car...

Have you travelled anywhere with 9 before? -nope in a sense overseas...nope..

If you give 14 $100 , what will he/she spend it on? -clothes???!!